Thanks for sharing your transition! Your post resonates well as we are on a somewhat similar path. I let go of my consultancy work last year after my health diagnosis, now on a new chapter with an open path.
Thank you for commenting! Wow, that sounds difficult. It is sad that health issues are so often necessary to make us finally realise that we need to change something (this has played a role for me as well). All the best for your journey!
The feeling of being alone will gradually fade as you spend more time outdoors, especially when you begin to replace people-y relationships with the presence of trees, birds, insects and other critters who do not judge your mind, but your energy. Thank you for sharing your nature journal with us all!
I totally get the 'useful or impressive' need when in nature - I've been slowly trying to wean myself off this too! Wishing you all the best with the changes you're making :)
Thank you - same to you :) I find that it can be surprisingly difficult to get rid of that thinking because it's so ingrained! I also do genuinely like to challenge myself physically sometimes, which can be hard to distinguish from wanting to be impressive. But I believe over time we'll manage; being aware is the most important step!
Interesting thoughts. I did anyway degree in Forensic Science but ended up hating it. Even though I was good at science, it just didn't fulfil me. I applaud you for working in the scientific field, it can't be easy.
Whenever I feel alone, I seek out nature. It's all I ever need and I find when I'm with other people I get distracted and don't feel the same connection.
But yes, you're right. We are nature, so inevitably you end up writing about other things / thoughts too.
Forensic Science sounds fascinating - but I can definitely understand why science wouldn't be fulfilling, and it requires so much sacrifice that it's not a good path to choose if one isn't fully into it. I still love many aspects of scientific work, but these days I feel more drawn to something with a more direct impact on the world, given how many problems and crises there are.
Yes, what you say about feeling distracted resonates a lot - it's similar for me. Nature helps me feel connected with other creatures but also with my own feelings (I guess that's in a sense what this post is about), and other people disrupt that. Still, I think I also do need some connections with humans in my life - doing a lot of reassessing at the moment.
Thanks for being so open and sharing your thoughts and your transition! It sounds incredibly hard, though, and I wish everything turns out well for you!!
Although I worked in a completely different field, I can relate to so much of what you said, like work and private life being inextricably connected although it's not wise, like how difficult or just impossible it can be as an introvert and highly sensitive person who works a lot to muster the energy to find friends outside work. Also how affection and appreciation for your work can get mixed up. I've been through all of this, too, and when I thought about quitting my job because of burnout and an unbearable working atmosphere, I stayed on for much too long because I was afraid of losing everything. And I did, actually. "Friends" and close acquaintances, appreciation, my status in our small town where I thought I was connected well, all gone, although I tried to keep in touch with some people I really liked or even tried to deepen some relationships. To no avail, which was tough. It turned out that I simply fulfilled a function well, nothing more. So, feeling alone although it's a good decision to move on, yes, I totally get that.
Thanks Claudia :) Well, I kind of knew this would resonate with you after our other discussions, but what you write about your town is still so shocking to me. It's hard not to lose confidence when this happens, but this kind of story is so common - many people are ready to drop you if you're not "functioning". I think it's not even that people are actively mean (at least not in my experience - of course I cannot speak for others); I think they just extend their care to only a very small circle of friends & family, and everyone beyond that isn't really seen as a human but mainly as their functional role, or something like that.
The advantage of being introverted is of course that we don't need that many people in our lives anyway... I'm making an effort now to reconnect with those few who I know really care, and maybe then things will be fine!
Thank you for your reply, Hannah! I agree, I don't think (most) people are actively mean either, but nevertheless, what kind of world is this where you see a human just in their functional role? It's puzzling me and, honestly, I think it's really sad.
Yes, needing not many people is an advantage, though. :) Good luck with your efforts! Those people are precious!
Thanks for sharing, a really thoughtful piece! I did a PhD in biology so a lot of what you're talking about really resonates, it's a strange bubble. Good for you for striking out and reducing your hours, it's mad that that's still seen as any reflection of your value or worth. I'm a junior doctor now and really appreciate being able to work my given hours without any pressure to stay too late or be seen to work longer hours. Like you struggle to enjoy just being I'm nature without being goal-driven, you're inspiring me to try more of this!
Thank you :) Yes absolutely, "strange bubble" describes it well! At least in my experience, it isn't even that people aren't nice - I think many of my colleagues are very kind by nature, and I've never had bosses who put much direct pressure on me. It's more that the extreme competition and uncertainty makes people forget about anything other than work.
It must feel very weird at first to have fixed hours!
Thank you for sharing. This resonates. Unlearning all of these unhelpful beliefs whilst still existing in a context that upholds these beliefs is difficult, but perhaps the only way to positive change. I feel less alone reading your posts.
Yes, I think you’re right. I do sometimes dream of completely leaving the context of pressure and expectations behind (moving to the wilderness alone, etc.), but it's hard to make that work. And maybe it's healthy to learn to set boundaries — and, in the end, we need to change the system rather than just leave it...
Thanks for sharing your transition! Your post resonates well as we are on a somewhat similar path. I let go of my consultancy work last year after my health diagnosis, now on a new chapter with an open path.
Thank you for commenting! Wow, that sounds difficult. It is sad that health issues are so often necessary to make us finally realise that we need to change something (this has played a role for me as well). All the best for your journey!
Hannah, Thanks for your kind note and well wishes. I like your monthly themes! Looking forward to continuing to learn from your journey.
The feeling of being alone will gradually fade as you spend more time outdoors, especially when you begin to replace people-y relationships with the presence of trees, birds, insects and other critters who do not judge your mind, but your energy. Thank you for sharing your nature journal with us all!
Thank you - I hope so for sure! I do hope to keep some people in my life too, but they will be chosen carefully...
I totally get the 'useful or impressive' need when in nature - I've been slowly trying to wean myself off this too! Wishing you all the best with the changes you're making :)
Thank you - same to you :) I find that it can be surprisingly difficult to get rid of that thinking because it's so ingrained! I also do genuinely like to challenge myself physically sometimes, which can be hard to distinguish from wanting to be impressive. But I believe over time we'll manage; being aware is the most important step!
Interesting thoughts. I did anyway degree in Forensic Science but ended up hating it. Even though I was good at science, it just didn't fulfil me. I applaud you for working in the scientific field, it can't be easy.
Whenever I feel alone, I seek out nature. It's all I ever need and I find when I'm with other people I get distracted and don't feel the same connection.
But yes, you're right. We are nature, so inevitably you end up writing about other things / thoughts too.
Forensic Science sounds fascinating - but I can definitely understand why science wouldn't be fulfilling, and it requires so much sacrifice that it's not a good path to choose if one isn't fully into it. I still love many aspects of scientific work, but these days I feel more drawn to something with a more direct impact on the world, given how many problems and crises there are.
Yes, what you say about feeling distracted resonates a lot - it's similar for me. Nature helps me feel connected with other creatures but also with my own feelings (I guess that's in a sense what this post is about), and other people disrupt that. Still, I think I also do need some connections with humans in my life - doing a lot of reassessing at the moment.
Thank you for your comment :)
Wise words
Thanks for being so open and sharing your thoughts and your transition! It sounds incredibly hard, though, and I wish everything turns out well for you!!
Although I worked in a completely different field, I can relate to so much of what you said, like work and private life being inextricably connected although it's not wise, like how difficult or just impossible it can be as an introvert and highly sensitive person who works a lot to muster the energy to find friends outside work. Also how affection and appreciation for your work can get mixed up. I've been through all of this, too, and when I thought about quitting my job because of burnout and an unbearable working atmosphere, I stayed on for much too long because I was afraid of losing everything. And I did, actually. "Friends" and close acquaintances, appreciation, my status in our small town where I thought I was connected well, all gone, although I tried to keep in touch with some people I really liked or even tried to deepen some relationships. To no avail, which was tough. It turned out that I simply fulfilled a function well, nothing more. So, feeling alone although it's a good decision to move on, yes, I totally get that.
Thanks Claudia :) Well, I kind of knew this would resonate with you after our other discussions, but what you write about your town is still so shocking to me. It's hard not to lose confidence when this happens, but this kind of story is so common - many people are ready to drop you if you're not "functioning". I think it's not even that people are actively mean (at least not in my experience - of course I cannot speak for others); I think they just extend their care to only a very small circle of friends & family, and everyone beyond that isn't really seen as a human but mainly as their functional role, or something like that.
The advantage of being introverted is of course that we don't need that many people in our lives anyway... I'm making an effort now to reconnect with those few who I know really care, and maybe then things will be fine!
Thank you for your reply, Hannah! I agree, I don't think (most) people are actively mean either, but nevertheless, what kind of world is this where you see a human just in their functional role? It's puzzling me and, honestly, I think it's really sad.
Yes, needing not many people is an advantage, though. :) Good luck with your efforts! Those people are precious!
Thanks :) And yes, totally agree that it's sad!
Thanks for sharing, a really thoughtful piece! I did a PhD in biology so a lot of what you're talking about really resonates, it's a strange bubble. Good for you for striking out and reducing your hours, it's mad that that's still seen as any reflection of your value or worth. I'm a junior doctor now and really appreciate being able to work my given hours without any pressure to stay too late or be seen to work longer hours. Like you struggle to enjoy just being I'm nature without being goal-driven, you're inspiring me to try more of this!
Thank you :) Yes absolutely, "strange bubble" describes it well! At least in my experience, it isn't even that people aren't nice - I think many of my colleagues are very kind by nature, and I've never had bosses who put much direct pressure on me. It's more that the extreme competition and uncertainty makes people forget about anything other than work.
It must feel very weird at first to have fixed hours!
Thank you for sharing. This resonates. Unlearning all of these unhelpful beliefs whilst still existing in a context that upholds these beliefs is difficult, but perhaps the only way to positive change. I feel less alone reading your posts.
Thanks a lot, this makes me so happy!
Yes, I think you’re right. I do sometimes dream of completely leaving the context of pressure and expectations behind (moving to the wilderness alone, etc.), but it's hard to make that work. And maybe it's healthy to learn to set boundaries — and, in the end, we need to change the system rather than just leave it...
Agree! We are part of the system and can influence it for good. 😊